Lindsey Graham Accuses Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Of Comparing Refugee Caravan To Holocaust

Sen. Lindsey Graham( R-S.C .) wasn’t impressed when Rep.-elect Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez( D-N.Y .) said applying for asylum is not a crime.

In fact, Graham accused the newly elected congresswoman of comparing the caravan of refugees currently in Tijuana with the Holocaust.

On Sunday, Ocasio-Cortez posted a tweet that attempted to point out the similarities between the caravan the member states and other groups who’ve escaped desperate situations in their home countries.

On Monday, Graham decided that Ocasio-Cortez wasn’t actually asking for tendernes for the caravan members but was somehow insulting Holocaust survivors.

Although Graham likely thought he was “owning the libs, ” Splinter News pointed out why his tweet induced no sense in vicious style 😛 TAGEND

“First off: What kind of sociopath realizes a person conveying empathy at children being tear gassed, and thinks to themselves’ you know what they need? A museum! ’”

The website went on to suppose what might happen if Ocasio-Cortez did “take Graham up on his completely dickish suggestion” to visit the Holocaust Museum.

“Odds are pretty good that even though they are she’d be informed about the German transatlantic liner St. Louis , which spent weeks during the spring of 1939 urgently trying to find a port of departure for its hundreds of Jewish passengers fleeing the Nazi Government — merely to have their attempt to dock in the United States blocked by the Roosevelt administration since, as the Museum’s website explains‘ they did not have US immigration visas and had not passed a security screening.’”

Both specific comments by Ocasio-Cortez and Graham came after U.S. border agents fired tear gas on hundreds of migrants near the border with Mexico after some of them attempted to get through the fencing and wire separating the two countries.

On Monday, Ocasio-Cortez recommended another way to handle the caravan that she felt might have better makes than the current situation 😛 TAGEND

Read more: http :// www.huffingtonpost.com/ entry/ lindsey-graham-alexandria-ocasio-cortez-refugee-tweet_us_5bfc 69 d2e4b0771fb6bd0fe9

The Minte raises $2.25 million in seed funding to bring hotel-style housekeeping to luxury residences

As an MBA student at the University of Chicago’s Booth school, Kathleen Wilson was struck with new ideas while looking at enterprises that provided daily housekeeping in one of her class. Made the concentration and physical structure of many apartment buildings, she wondered why a housekeeper couldn’t similarly push a cart down the auditorium and spend an hour or reductions in each unit.

To test out her theory, Wilson and a classmate started cleaning the apartments of friends, spending 30 minutes to an hour at a time and trying to establish a reasonable cost degree for the study. Armed with enough data, Wilson then landed at a local real estate tech accelerator, formed her company, and locked down her first property handling company client, Waterton — and her efforts have been gaining momentum since.

In fact, her 20 -month-old startup, The Minte, which now applies roughly 60 people, is today announcing that it has raised $2.25 million in a round that brings the company’s total seed funding to $4.7 million. Dundee Venture Capital resulted this newest round; other investors in the company include MATH Venture Partners, Revolution’s Rise of the Rest Seed Fund, Firebrand Ventures, Blue Note Ventures and numerous angel investors. We had a quick converse with Wilson earlier this week to learn more.

TC: Can you tell us a bit more about your clients? Are they all property management companies like Waterton ?

KW: We merely provide service to apartments and condos, so our patrons are currently property management corporations such as Greystar, Bozzuto, Lincoln Property Company and CA Ventures. We have just under 70 properties in Chicago, another 20 in D.C. and we’ve been launching six to 10 new properties in each marketplace each month.

TC: The Minte have committed themselves to make a housekeeper available to a property full-time, correct ?

KW: Yes. A housekeeper is located on website for inhabitants to book cleaning services with them, so that inhabitants are provided with consistency and trust. To be clear, our housekeepers are full-time Minte employees with health benefits and paid time off. We retain our housekeeping cart and supplies at each property, and there’s a place for housekeepers to run if they have a bit of downtime, although that’s rare.

We do have some housekeepers who split their hour between properties, either if the property is smaller or if we’re still in the first couple months of service and still building demand.

TC: What induces the company think people would prefer to work with The Minte versus housekeepers they know? These are trust-heavy relationships, a feature that other housecleaning startups have overlooked to their harm .

KW: Exactly. We bring the personal trust by having the same housekeeper allocated to the property, which allows the housekeeper to get to know the residents, and we bring the corporate side of trust by having insurance, QA by both managers and the ability to send a backup housekeeper if someone is out sick. We also have top-notch, live customer service if there is ever an issue.

TC: What does your quality assurance process involve ?

KW: It’s a multi-tier process. First, we’ve enforced an eight-day develop program for all new housekeepers. Second, housekeepers and housekeeping directors with whom “were working” almost always have hotel backgrounds, having run at the Waldorf Astoria, The Conrad and Sofitel, to name a few. Third, housework administrators do random spot check of service. And fourth, users can rate and comment on every service, which we review in real day. It’s company policy to reach out to the resident any time something is less than four stars.

Also worth mentioning: our products are eco-friendly, P& G products, so there’s no compromise on the quality of our supplies.

TC: How do clients pay, and how much do they pay? Is this a subscription modeling ?

KW: They can pay a la carte — paying $30 for a hotel-style service, $90 for a deep clean for a one-bedroom apartment, for example — but over half of our cleans are residents who are on a recurring bundle. For clients on a bundle, they can customize how many deep cleans and/ or hotel-style cleans they have every four weeks, including which days those cleans occur.

TC: The home services framework is more prone to leakage, intending people form relationships and stop using the platform. Is this a concern ?

KW: Our staff members shall be full-time, so this is essentially a non-issue for us. With our housekeepers on our schedule throughout the week, it’s not feasible for someone to poach them.

Potentially a resident could do this on a weekend, but in our experience, one wants housekeepers to come when they are not home. Furthermore, the property director would tell us if our housekeeper was get keys outside of their Minte schedule.

TC: And how are you marketing the company ?

KW: Through our partnership with the property administrators, primarily.

TC: How will you use your new funding ?

KW: We’ll continue to enhance our tech. Our app is out this week, and we’re rolling out our smart home integration in the coming months. We’re making our button — which is now being physical hardware that goes on the wall inside each unit — more readily available. We’ll likewise expand more into condos and corporate dwelling and target our third metropoli in early 2019.

Read more: https :// techcrunch.com/ 2018/11/ 02/ the-minte-raises-2- 25 -million-in-seed-funding-to-bring-hotel-style-housekeeping-to-luxury-residences /

Home insurance provider Hippo brings in $70M amid a record year in funding for insurtech startups

Felicis Ventures and Lennar Corporation have co-led the $70 million Series C funding round for Hippo, a tech-enabled home insurance marketplace.

Existing investors in the startup, like Comcast Ventures, Fifth Wall Ventures, Horizons Ventures and GGV Capital, likewise were involved in these round.

Hippo has raised $109 million to date, including a $25 million Series B the beginning of this year. Co-founder and chief executive officer Assaf Wand declined to disclose Hippo’s valuation.

Wand, who co-founded the startup in 2015 with Eyal Navon, said he spent 14 times seeing the technology that would become Hippo, inspired by his father’s career in the outmoded insurance industry.

Hippo co-founder and chief executive officer Assaf Wand.

” I was born into insurance ,” Wand told TechCrunch.” Now, the entire real estate ecosystem is changing and service industries is massive. We are getting a crazy good challenge. We guess the sky’s the limit with this thing .”

The Mountain View, Calif.-based company officially launched to customers in 2017. It plans to use its latest investment to fuel the growth of its product, which sells home insurance programs at lower premiums. So far this year, Hippo has expanded into 10 new states and says its sales have grown 30 percent month-over-month since January.

Insurance startups have raised billions as industry players opposed tech disruptors

” Hippo has defined the bar for the future of insurance with its fully automated, proprietary policy management and proactive underwriting, ” Felicis managing director Victoria Treyger was indicated in a statement. “Insurance is the next big sector to undergo the dramatic metamorphosi of client experience and improved risk management enabled by access to real time data. We visualize Hippo’s current growth rate and effective automated policy management system as just the beginning of driving this transformation.”

Treyger will join Hippo’s board of directors as part of the round.

The insurance industry is indeed undergoing a dramatic change as a result of technology companies targeting the sector, which are part of a relatively new category of startups dubbed insurtech.

According to PitchBook, insurtech startups have raised virtually$ 6 billion in venture capital funding since 2012. This year alone, companies in the space have brought in a record amount of capital at $1.8 billion across 94 deals.

Whether or not the hype for the emerging category will continue into 2019 remains to be seen.

Read more: https :// techcrunch.com/ 2018/11/ 14/ home-insurance-provider-hippo-brings-in-7 0m-amid-a-record-year-in-funding-for-insurtech-startups /

15+ Cringiest Moments Where People Had To Say This Isnt What It Looks Like

We’ve all been caught in an uncomfortable situation that seemed weird on the outside but actually had a fairly reasonable explanation. Too bad, that often these experiences are so awkward for all the people involved that you don’t even have an opportunity to explain yourself. A Reddit user asked people to share their ‘biggest this isn’t what it looks like moments’ and the weave was flooded with the most embarrassing stories. Scroll below to read some and share your own in specific comments! ( Facebook cover image: iStock)

# 2

More of a “this isnt what it sounds like”…

A family we were close to had just moved to the US from India. They had a young daughter, like 5 years old, who was still learning English. One day she fell down the stairs while playing outside. She ran in hollering and saying “The stairs hit me! ” … once she calmed down her daddy corrected her and said “No no. You mean to say ‘I fell down the stairs’.”

A few days later my dad was demonstrating them the grocery store. In the checkout line the cashier understood the girl’s bruised up legs and asked what happened. The daughter responded with “What did you tell me to say, father? Oh right! I fell down the stairs.”

He had a fun time explaining that to the police.

# 3

It was my third day at my new office chore. When I washed my hands my gasps touched the counter top which was covered with sea. Naturally I now look like I pissed myself and had a giant 6 by 6 soaked area around my crotch. I couldnt walk around with that so I thought to use the hand dryer. Nonetheless, the hand dryer was the different types that you stick your hands in instead under. So I line up and basically mount this hand dryer like I am looking for a good time. I look at myself in the reflect and as I start believing “this wont appear good if…” and of course the CIO walks in before I could finish the thoughts and react. He looks at me and in deadpan voice says “Do I need to call HR? ” to which I responded “No, its consensual.” We had a good chuckle about it and he never let me forget that minute!

# 4

This is one of my mommas absolute favorite stories to tell:

My partner and I were in a kind of long distance relationship at this phase( high schoolers living 40 mins apart) and they are able to occasionally drive up after school to come see me

On this particular day my mommy came home from operate and was concerned with the lack of sound.

I hear her calling my name as she comes closer, she eventually gets to my closed bedroom door not wanting to see what I’m sure every parent is looking forward to by this point

She swings it open and observes my partner and I

…..putting together our brand new Millennium Falcon( full size for act figures) that we had just bought from Toys R us

My dog retained stepping on the pieces and messing things up in his dopiness so we shut the door

After that she never worried about us being alone.

Honestly think this might be the moment where my mom decided she wanted to adopt my partner.

Sometimes, I’m not sure who she loves more ……. s/

Btw – My partner and I got married this year and we still have that Millennium Falcon

# 5

I used to take my kids to different playgrounds as they were growing up. Often times I’d be out there with them, chasing them, being the random monster/ dragon/ foe while they run away and then eventually turn around and chase me back. Unavoidably since the rest of the parents were on their iPhones or doing anything but interacting with their kids, I’d end up with a collect who wanted to join in the fun.

It was all going well until they said they wanted to play “Minecraft”

So as a group of kids abruptly scatter from where I am standing screaming “Ah! Run away from the Creeper! Ahhh! ” I look up to see a line of parents abruptly jostled back into consciousness with absolutely no friggin context whatsoever.

# 6

My dad not me. Working construction in the dead of winter he gets back to the motel after drawing the night shift, he sits down on the couch and he is so frozen can’t bend down to take off his boots so his coworker who is a gigantic man gets down on his knees to undo my dad’s boots. The cleaning lady barges in to realize a massive humankind on his knees and head down in front of another man who’s sitting on the edge of a bed. Now my father did what anyone would do hurl his hands behind his head and moaned real loud.

# 7

Anytime I open a can that isn’t cat meat I have to explain to my feline that “this isn’t what it looks like.”

# 8

I work as a administrator at a grocery store. Some cashiers aren’t old sufficient to scan booze so I have to do it for them. I made a comment to a girl cashier after the 4th period she called me over. “I can’t wait until you’re 19. ” Took me a few seconds to realize what I said, in front of customers.

# 9

I used to work security/ reception at my corporation, so I greeted everyone when they came in the door and built sure they were wearing their safety badge. You could either wear your badge on a lanyard around your neck or on a retractable belt clip.

So I’ve been doing this job for like 2 years when I’m outside talking to some of the girls that work on the 2nd storey. One of them only flat out asks why I ever check out women when they come in to visit.

Excuse me?

Turns out, there was a lot of talking here how I was “looking women up and down” when they came through the door. Well, I was seeming everyone up and down. I would look at their chest first and if there was no badge there, my eyes would move to their belt. It was kind of my job and stuff.

#10

I will preface this by saying a couple of weeks prior to this, my spouse had bought some frilly underwear on clearance sale, and a couple of bananas to eat on the way to work. I was chilling in the car at the store while “shes gone” in when I smelled nasty over-ripe bananas. I reached into the backseat and pulled out the purse that had been forgotten back there. I take the underwear out of the purse and tie the old banana up dog poo style. No big deal, right?

For whatever reason, my brain goes I wonder if these brand new underwear now reek of old squishy banana? and I threw them to my nose and take a big whiff- right as a sweet old lady draws into the parking spot in front of our auto. She looks at me, panties pressed into my nose inhaling deeply, her eyes move wide-ranging with surprise, and visibly sway, she draws back out of the place and drives away. Literally leaves. Shopping trip-up cancelled. I know I had to look like some kind of degenerate pervert on a public minge-binge, but it wasn’t what it looked like.

TLDR: Seemed like a unclean panty smelling weirdo in the grocery store parking lot, nearly stimulate old lady stroke out in horror

I went to my friend’s house last night( edit: not actually last nighttime. I told this story before on Reddit and copy-pasted it without changing the time frame) and came back around 12:30 am. To set some context, my friend lives about an hour away from me on the opposite side of the city. When I was driving back home afterwards, this automobile cut me off on the on ramp, and I honked at them. I then turned back up the music, and pretty much drove home on autopilot, but when I got off the road at my exit, I realized that the same car that cut me off was in front of me. After that, I get kind of curious, because it had been about 30 minutes since the incident, and we’d changed roads twice already. I then got a little bit worried that they’d envision I was following them home, but I didn’t think too much of it–until the car started going up the same side streets I did.

Eventually, I realized that my 16 -year age-old neighbour who simply learned how to drive cut me off, and she and her friends were probably now petrified that some lunatic was following them home. I guess she’d called her mothers in the meantime because she drew into her driveway and the house lights were all lit up, and her father( a huge guy) was standing outside with a baseball bat. I then drew into my own garage and apologized for frightening them and it was all chill after that.

#12

When I was little, my mommy would sometimes take me working in cooperation with her at a little store she operated. I would often pass the time( and stay out of moma

s mane) by depicting and handing out my a

works of arta

to clients. One period, when I was 3 or 4, I learned about dialing 911. I apparently reckoned the concept was so important, I wrote a

bellow 911 a

on all the doodles I handed out to the customers at moma

s shop that evening. Patently people starting supposing I had been kidnapped or something, and freaked out. My mama had fun explaining that one to the police!

#13

My boyfriend and I had a fight and both went to bed grumpily( we therefore housemates and had separate bedrooms ). In the middle of the night I heard a LOUD thump in the living room area of the house. I grabbed my baseball bat and went through the entire house with the at-bat( and the daylights on ). Every closet, every closet, etc. Nothing was out of order and the doors were locked. I was still scared and running high on adrenaline.

It was about 4:30 in the morning and I had to get up at 6 so I only gave up on going back to sleep before that. I debated what to do for the hour and a half and decided to go to IHOP( open 24 h where I live ). As I was about to leave I realized that if I left my sleeping boyfriend in the house and the killers WAS actually still there and killed him I would feel highly guilty. So I went to wake him up just enough to warn him before I left for IHOP.

He woke up to me leaning over his couch, comprising a bat, and whispering about slaughter. He almost cried.

#14

I was 16 and my parents only left the house for a dinner out. I had to do laundry so I start right after they left the door to get it done as early as possible.

As I’m filling the machine I notice a stain on my shirt and so I threw it with the rest of the clothes. I also look at my pants and decide to add them as well along with my socks and…f ** k it my underwear as well.

So I’m butt naked and I start the machine. I rush to the stairs to get to my room and dress up and that’s when the front door( which is right where the stairs are) opens and I freeze.

My dad comes in and sees me naked. We both aren’t moving a few seconds and then he laughs, grabs his wallet on the table and says: “So THAT’S what you are doing while we aren’t here? “. He then closes the door while giggling.

I’m there still in shock and ruby-red as a beet. I rush to dress and call my parents on my mother’s cell phone to tell them it’s not what they suppose as they are just laughing their ass off.

#15

My best friend of 15 years, J, is a guy and with me being a girl we have always tolerated people assuming we HAVE to have sex. Spoiler: we dona

t.

Anyways, we are camping with a few friends and got supremely drunk. One of my girlfriends, M, has taken off into the lumbers after a fight with her boyfriend and the 4 of us are trying to find her. At this level, Ia

m so full of tequila I know Ia

m are due to vomit so I ask my best friend to hold my whisker back.

We are in complete darkness, Ia

m on all fours puking, hea

s awkwardly standing in front of me kinda crouched down because hea

s a foot taller than me and comprising all my mane up while I heave. It looked … I know HOW it seemed but on “peoples lives” I was get sick. At this exact moment, M runs out of the woods, flashlight directly on us and shrieks a

HOLY S ** T SHES BLOWING HIM! a

Ia

m legit retching so hard I dona

t even heard her. By the time we got back to the campfire M had told everyone else what she saw. Shea

s still adamant to this day that she knows what she saw.

Edit: wow everyone got the incorrect suggestion of M wholly! Shea

s truly not a b ** ch, dramatic OH GOD yes but a b ** ch no. We had a metric f ** k ton of tequila that night no one was thinking rationallyd

As for J, hea

s not in the a

pal zonea

ya f ** kina

sad fathers. Ita

s possible to desire someone, enjoy their company and emotional support, without craving or required to be put your genitalia into their assorted body cavities.

#16

Back when the Netflix app on Xbox had the theatre define where you could invite pals and watch movies. My pals and I were watching the history of sex film( being horny 12 year olds and thinking sex was funny) they paused the video on the statue of two guys f ** king, then my father strolled in. I looked at him embarrassed saying, “this isnt what it looks like” my father said, “it’s okay mike I’d love you anyways” and walked out.

#17

Alright, as a student, when I visited my hometown I got to visit my grandmother before leaving back to university and granny always had small-scale chocolates for people visiting her. Her grandchildren would get more than one usually. As I was leaving the house she gave me one more to have it during the travel back home.

I ate a piece of chocolate while loading my stuff in the car and I throw the small chocolate in my back pocket, right before I say goodbye to my mothers. It was a hot day at the end of summer.

A bit before the exit to the freeway I was taking, I stopped at a traffic light and realized that the chocolate between my butt and my vehicle seat was not a good mind, so I’m reaching for it. Chocolate already melted and package already open attained my left hand full of melted chocolate.

Following the loud “well, s ** t”, I realize that the girl in the car next to me only appreciated a guy reaching his butt and bringing his hand up again full of a dark-brown unknown sticky thing.

The look on her face was entirely worth it. Simply bad thing is that melted chocolate won’t go away merely with tissues.

#18

My friend and I were sitting at lunch bitching about this Chris guy who was in our class and who was an absolute twat. Really not a nice human being. At one point I turned around and insured another Chris, an absolute sweetheart, sitting nearby seeming utterly crushed. Took 5 minutes to convince him that we were not talking about him. I felt so bad though.

#19

Not me but a kid I worked with. He comes in to the violate room comprising some sandwiches and a Dr Pepper, sits down and starts eating and then tries to have a liquor but he can’t open it. I offer to twist the eyelid off but no, he can do it he says.

So he puts this Dr Pepper in between his legs, grabs the eyelid with both hands and spins. This, patently, wasn’t a bright suggestion. It explodes over his lap attaining him look like he’s pissed himself.

So he goes to the bathroom to clean up, gets some loo rolling and starts mopping up but it still looks really bad.

Over by the radiator is a hand dryer, so in his infinite wise he throws one foot on top of the radiator and the slants his crotch to the hand dryer and starts rubbing furiously as the hand drier’s going.

Unluckily for him, he’s facing away from the door so when the next guy walkings in all he can see is this skinny dude rubbing his crotch like no tomorrow while waving it for the purposes of the hand drier.

Apparently the guy only walked right on back away after muttering a “sorry”.

He didn’t find it funny when I pointed out the Dr Pepper motto was “What’s the worst that can happen? “

#20

One time during my teens, I was utilizing my grandparents’ computer to look up video game cheater codes. I was worried they might disapprove that I was employing cheats, so when my grandfather strolled into the room, I rapidly minimise the window and turned around to say hello and ask what he needed.

His response: “Oh nothing important, I’ll just come back later.” He virtually seemed to be rushing out.

I turned back to the computer screen in confusion, be noted that minimise the window had disclosed a pornographic pop-up ad hiding in the background. I was super embarrassed. He never mentioned it though.

I put my daddy in this situation when I was a kid. Probably around 10 years old or so.

For context, my papa rarely drank in front of us growing up but would occasionally have a beer. As parents often do, he would have me move get it for him if we were in the same chamber. I was a lazy kid and didn’t want to miss whatever we were watching on TV so I often observed this to be an exasperation but somewhat minor in the grand strategy of things.

So one day he’s chatting with a couple coworkers and I’m there. They were joking around about something and he turns to me and asks “You like me, right? ” I answer back “Yeah except for when you drink beer”.

Adult me face palms every time I think about that. My dad is awesome.

#22

My boyfriend and I were hopping on the trampoline together years ago, merely ricochetting around like a couple of kids, giggling our butts off. It was fun! He accidentally butt dialed his parents, who speakerphoned our laugh, creaking springtimes, and gasping to a auto loading of people. They were all mortified. We were able to set it straight afterwards, but OOF. Sorry mom and dad.

#23

The girl I was dating during sophomore year of college and I were both organ majors, preparing for an upcoming duet.

During the summer, it was so warm in the church where we practised( no air conditioning, and the organ installed up high in the rear where it was extra hot) that she and I played in our underwear, with just a small devotee to move the air.

We were shocked when we heard the locked door open, and realise the pastor enter the church. He glanced at us, playing the organ in next-to-nothing, but promptly left and locked the door behind him.

Later he told me at first he did a double-take, but then recognized we therefore doing the smart thing – and that in his seminary days, he would’ve done likewise.

#24

I worked at a care home for the elderly. We had one patient who had Alzheimer’s and one of the few styles we had to soothe her when upset was to have her fold the napkins. I guess it stimulated her tranquilize to know she was being helpful, or maybe it reminded her of her past as a spouse/ mother.

So she was doing her folding one afternoon and a potential new inhabitant comes in with their own families. My resident with Alzheimer’s craves a change of tempo, but words it like “I’m genuinely getting tired…”

It looked for sure like were forcing elderly people with dementia to do all our operate … until they were exhausted.

#25

Technically my mom’s.

My eldest cousin was a little shit. She was with my mom( her aunt) at the grocery store. She was around 5. My mom told her she could pick a treat, she said she craved a candy and an ice cream. Mom said no, she had to pick 1.

So my cousin says to the cashier ‘shes not my mother! ‘ and the cashier freaks out reckoning cousins been kidnapped or something. Mom had to explain that she’s her aunt. I think they ended up having to call my aunt, cousins momma, to explain the situation. This was back in like ‘8 5. My mom’s still annoyed.

#26

Oh man. Sitting at a traffic light when I was eighteen. Craved to get something out of my pocket( chapstick I believe ). I was wearing jeans that, when sitting, might as well have locked pockets. I continue my eyes forward so I can see if the lighting turns green, while I dig into my pocket. Have to kind of thrust my hips upwards and move a bit to reach my hand amply into my jeans. During my gyrating pocket quest I induce eye contact with a girl traversing the crosswalk( Ia

m a guy ). A appear of horror crosses her face and she says something to her friend. The other girl gives me a disgusted seem as well and they hurry across the crosswalk. Ia

m sure it seemed bad from their perspective.

#27

I was getting ready to take a shower( my bedroom has its own bathroom/ shower) and I was already naked in my bedroom simply waiting for the sea to get hot. Well, my dog was also in my bedroom because he ever hangs out there. I was feeing M& Ms merely lying on my couch naked during this time and plummeted an M& M onto the ground and it rolled under my couch. Being very anxious about what my dog feeds( especially chocolate ), I promptly got onto my knees on the ground and went to reach for the purposes of the bed for the M& M. It rolled kinda far, so I was doing that thing wherever you stretching your arm out as much as you are able to for the purposes of the bed and just barely touching whatever it is youa

re trying to get, without knocking it farther away. Well, my golden retriever discovered the position I was in and walked over and mounted me. Literally at that moment, my momma opens the door to my bedroom and sees me butt naked, bent on my knees, with my bird-dog mounted behind me. I intend, talk about the doggy style point ……. I had a lot of explaining to do. It felt like an American Pie situation.

#28

When I was in secondary school we therefore roller skating and I couldn’t stop so I lifted my hands to not hit this girl in front of me. Of course I’m like “ahhhhhhhh” as I’m about to run into her and because of this she turns around right as I’m about to hit her and both my hands cup her boobs.

The teacher was like “Ron what the hell are you doing ?! “

#29

Not mine but just heard this story last week from a friend. At a ball game with his sister/ friend in law and 4-5yo nephew. Brother in line for concessions, sister back at seats or whatever, little one needs to use restroom, they tell my chum no problem merely head in with the kid he knows the drill. The kid, like many do, starts to various kinds of strip down before going to the bathroom starts asking inquisitive questions about why there are so many people in bathroom, why are things the route they are in that restroom, but ultimately culminating with the now practically naked little kid asking him in a crowded public restroom, “but where is my family? “

#30

Friend was growing weed in his closet, we were checking it out and his mama comes calling and then just walks right upstairs into his apartment. He runs out to intercept her, I run out 2 mins subsequently after closing up the rig, and she believes to this day we therefore having sex. Even told his then-fiance that she understands if we have a “group arrangement”…

Went to a friend’s house and since it was an after party for a play-act, in high school, on a Friday, of course there was beer and “weve all” underage. I wasn’t drinking but a buddy of mine needed to go home so I plummeted him off and headed back. As I get out of the car when I got back I noticed it was quiet but it’s a huuuge home( like 4-5k square feet) and I figured they were in the cellar doing something quieter and I couldn’t listen to them. Front door locked … OK I was just here 15 minutes ago, chief to back door, unlocked. Awesome. Now the whole house was beeping as if someone was breaking in. Holy fuck that’s this house right here. OH F ** K THAT’S ME.

Run into basement , nobody there. Upstairs , nobody there. Kitchen, lights off. Start to hear the house telephone reverberating but I don’t answer and I know it’s too late. Call friend , no response. Call another friend , no response. Read brew cans everywhere so I clean them up and conceal them, disguises the brownies they had, checked around the house one more day for material and waited for my inevitable demise. Friends call me back as I’m outside freaking the inferno out and they start to rush home.

Long story short the cops depicted up with two dogs and artilleries pointed at me and I get slammed to the ground and handcuff, friends arrived at home and explained situation just in time before I’m hauled off, they decided to run out to eat at the exact convenient time I left, never told me, and left the bank door unlocked with the house alarm armed. That was a hell of a night…

#32

Was sitting and watching Tv, neighbours came over to visit with their kids. Their daughter operates over, inexplicably sits in my lap and jumps up and down several times before I can stand up.

The remote was in my lap. Kid says “What’s that hard thing? ” and stands up promptly. A little shaken, I also stand up, the remote falls off my lap and lands on the floor, and as I lean down to pick it up, I take a step forward and I kick it for the purposes of the coffee table. Turn to explain myself , notice I’m wearing pants that bunch up in the crotch Larry David style.

Awkward.

#33

I drew an all-nighter once, came home after project, and sat down at the computer to check some emails. I was barely able to comprehend the words on the screen I was so tired. I reached into my gym shorts to scratch my balls, and I guess i just passed out within the next few seconds. I was detected passed out in the computer chair with my hand down the front of my shorts.

#34

My brother and I got into a fist battle( he was right, I was wrong) and he punched me in the mouth. I was hemorrhaging pretty good and continued spitting blood on him for some reason. He went into the condo( vacation) and my mommy freaked out because he had blood all over him. It ran a little like this Mom – OMG YOUa

RE COVERED IN BLOOD Brother – calm down it isna

t my blood Mom – OMFG WHOSE BLOOD IS IT WHAT DID YOU DO ?!?! Brother – Mom Ita

s fine ita

s simply Tylera

s( me) blood Mom – OMFG DID YOU F ** KING KILL HIM ?!?! WHERE IS TYLER ?!?!? I strolled in shortly after alive and well. The dispute between my brother and I was resolved btw.

#35

This is light-hearted.

I was like 13 channel surfing. I’m flowing through the crap channels. Exaclty as my papa walkings in the back door with my little brother, I flip past a browse network that is showing bras on live frameworks. I must have been on that channel for. 8 seconds. It was so ridiculously day, that it looked like I had the demonstrate on and changed it right after he came in. He gave me s ** t for it and wouldn’t believe me.

#36

When my brother was young he was playing with the vacuum and covered himself with those suction circles. He had a physical subsequently that day and was like he was covered in hickeys

#37

Also more of a “this isn’t what it sounds like”…

I was a weird person in high school, and my friends are similarly weird. We had no boundaries.

My friend and I were strolling to class, and were discussing the Jackass clip where they had a gas mask and tube assembly where one person wore the mask and the other farted into the tube. We supposed this sounded like a pretty cool notion and were considering trying this out..

As we walked around the corner, I said to him, “I’ll suck yours if you’d suck mine”. Que the hot girl conveniently rounding the corner at that precise moment…

#38

My wife and I used to hide money in her underwear drawer so our kids won’t be delving through it because they think it’s gross. One morning, I was get garmented and wanted to get some money before I forget, so I was excavating through her underwear when my 5-year old son ensure me. He asked what I was doing and naturally, I can’t tell him that I needed fund so I had to say something like that I was cleaning things up. Pretty sure he didn’t believe me and envisioned I was looking for a pair to wear.

Read more: http :// www.boredpanda.com/ this-isnt-what-it-looks-like-moment-ask-reddit /~ ATAGEND

How to stream U.S. elections coverage if you dont have TV

You don’t need a TV to tune in to live coverage of the U.S. elections results today- and you don’t have to have Hulu or the other live TV streaming service, either. Today, YouTube announced a listing of news organizations that will be broadcasting live elections coverage on its site today- helpful for those who don’t have another way to watch at home, or need to tune in while on the go. There’s also live coverage available on other websites, including Facebook, Twitch, Twitter and elsewhere.

As more people cut the cord with traditional pay TV, YouTube’s reach has been growing when it comes to distributing the news. That’s apparent in the list of available news media organizations that has now decided to broadcast live to YouTube tonight.

For comparison’s sake, YouTube in 2016 reported viewers had invested over 20 million hours watching and rewatching the presidential debates on the site ahead of the U.S. elections. It then pointed spectators to live coverage from a handful of outlets like NBC, PBS, Bloomberg and Telemundo, as well as MTV, the online news show The Young Turks, and an election special from Complex News.

This time around, all the major broadcast networks are participating on YouTube’s platform.

The company says spectators can tune in to watch live election results throughout the evening on the following channels 😛 TAGEND

ABC News

CBS News

Fox News

NBC News

PBS NewsHour

Telemundo

Univision

USA Today

Washington Post

Hero pilot Sully Sullenberger wrote a blistering anti-Trump letter begging people to vote.

Retired pilot Chelsea “Sully” Sullenberger is a timeless hero. His quick reasoning saved 155 lives. Heck, they needed Tom Hanks to play him in the movie, he’s that good.

However, he’s also very worried about where our home countries is heading and he’s not afraid to call out Donald Trump’s brand of politics over it.

First, consider the resume: Along with his heroic acts aboard U.S. Airways Flight 1549, Sully is also an Air Force veteran and a registered Republican. So, when he puts his epithet on the line asking people to vote, you know it’s not just another shot in the dark.

“This is not the America I know and adoration, ” he writes a Washington Post op-ed .

Sully doesn’t call out Trump by epithet but it’s impossible to miss the implications 😛 TAGEND

“Many are cowardly, complicit enablers, acting against the rights and interests of the United States, our friends and republic; encouraging radicals at home and emboldening our antagonists abroad; and threatening the livability of our planet.”

For Sully, this is clearly less about partisanship or even specific policies. He’s calling for a return to the norms of civil discourse and a respect for the institutions that have served America well for centuries:

“Many do not respect the offices they comprise; they lack — or disregard — a basic knowledge of history, science and leadership; and they act impulsively, worsening a toxic political context, ” he continued.

“We must rededicate ourselves to the ideals, values and norms that unite us and upon which our republic depends. We must be engaged and informed voters, and we must get our info from believable, reputable sources.”

Read more: http :// www.upworthy.com/ hero-pilot-sully-sullenberger-wrote-a-blistering-anti-trump-letter-begging-people-to-vote

Edmund Kemper: A Killer With Severe Mommy Issues

https :// tcat.tc/ 2K7mKtG
Cataloged in Creepy/ Serial Killers

Edmund Kemper: A Killer With Severe Mommy Issues

Edmund Kemper is larger than life in many ways: He stands six feet, nine inches tall, weighs 280 pounds, and has an IQ that tested at 145. But this giant of a humankind was also endlessly belittled and abused by his dominating mom, Clarnell Kemper, and it was his lifelong struggle to squirm out from under her thumb that proved to be his undoing.

All told, “Big Ed” killed ten people–his grandparents, his mother, his mother’s friend, and six young woman he picked up hitchhiking in Northern California from 1972 -1 973, which earned him the moniker “The Co-Ed Killer.” His gruesome crimes involved decapitation, necrophilia, and cannibalism.

What seems nearly as unsettling as his crimes, though, is his rare ability to enunciate his motivations. Even though he is very careful not to blame his mother for his later deeds, he insists that understanding her role in his formative times could help prevent the process of developing future Ed Kempers.

Early Years: Limited To The Basement

Edmund Emil Kemper III was born in California in 1948, the only son of three children born to Edmund Emil Kemper II and Clarnell Kemper. Weighing thirteen pounds at birth, he was a monster from the start.

In every interview he’s ever granted, Kemper has described his family as “matriarchal” and his mother as controlling and abusive. He called her a “big, ugly, awkward lady who was six feet tall and she was always trying to get me to go out with girls who were just like her.” Ed’s father, a veteran who allegedly was belittled by Clarnell for his “menial” job as an electrician, concurred: “suicide missions in wartime and the atomic bomb testings were nothing compared to living with her, ” his father afterward said after divorcing Clarnell.

Ed says he started to feel his mother’s searing misandry when she let his two sisters to sleep upstairs while she forced him to sleep in the basement. He says she constantly called him “stupid, ” a “sissy, ” a “real weirdo, ” and would smack the hell out of him for the slightest act of insubordination.

Ed asserts his older sister tortured him, once jostle him in front of an oncoming qualify and another time virtually drowning him in a swimming pool. He would play macabre plays with his sisters such as “Electric Chair” and “Gas Chamber, ” where they’d sit on a chair in his bedroom and pretend they were receiving the death penalty. When one of his sisters dedicated him a doll for Christmas, he cut off its hands and brain. He also hid the family cat alive before chopping off its head, placing it on a stay, and muttering a prayer. At one point when his sister razzed him by saying he wanted to kiss his female educator, a very young Ed ominously said, “If I kissed her, I’d have to kill her first.”

Age 15: Ed Murders His Grandparents

Feeling despised and profoundly unwanted by his mother, Ed went to live with his papa and his new stepmother in Los Angeles when he was 14, at which point he was already 6’4”. But this new stepmother resented him too, and Ed was sent to live with his grandparents in Montana.

Here, too, Ed felt he was trapped in an anti-male matriarchy, grumbling that his grandmother “was constantly emasculating me and my grandfather.” On August 27, 1964, Ed and his grandmother quarreled in the kitchen. Ed left the room and returned with a hunting rifle, whereupon he hit his grandmother in the psyche and twice in the back, killing her. Dreading that she had not succumbed yet and claiming that he didn’t crave her to suffer, he stabbed her multiple times with a kitchen knife and let the life bleed out of her. When his granddad returned home, Ed stepped out into the driveway and hit him dead. He then called his mother and told her what he’d done. She told him to call the police, which he did. When asked why he slaughtered his grandparents, he reportedly told investigators,’ I just wondered how it would feel to shoot grandma.”

Court psychiatrists diagnosed Kemper with paranoid schizophrenia and shuffled him off to the criminally insane unit at Atascadero State Hospital. But authorities at research hospitals disagreed and said that Kemper “showed no signs of delusion no flight of suggestions , no interference with thought , no expres of hallucinations or hallucinations, and no evidence of bizarre thinking.” At best, they said he was passive-aggressive.

During his stay at the mental hospital, Kemper was allegedly a model hostage and allegations he successfully helped introduce the notion of “Overt Hostility” to the popular Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory test.

On his 21 st birthday in December 1969, Kemper was liberated from the mental hospital and–against the strong the recommendations issued by psychiatrists–he was released back into his mother’s care.

Edmund Kemper is the Co-Ed Killer

Edmund Kemper’s mugshot upon entering prison, 1973

Kemper claims that upon his return to live with his mother, the verbal insult continued.

He discovered a undertaking as a construction-company flagman and invested his spare time poring over detective magazines, snuff cinemas, and John Wayne movies. He accumulated weapons, his favorite being a grotesquely large-scale hunting knife which he called ” The General .” He was again will be submitted to Clarnell’s incessant put-downs and petty shames. He fantasized about killing her, often tiptoeing into her room with a artillery as she slept, yet procuring himself unable to pull the trigger.

Around 1972, Ed started prowling Northern California’s roads for hitchhikers. His first co-ed victims were a pair of female students from Fresno State University. He forced one of them at gunpoint to climbing into his trunk. He placed a plastic pouch over the other’s chief, stabbing her in the back and stomach before slitting her throat. Kemper then bayoneted the woman who was in the trunk and took both daughters home, where they were decapitated and buried nearby.

His next victim was a dance student, whom he killed and then raped, ejaculating into the corpse virtually upon contact. He brought her body home and severed her hands and feet, just as he had done to his sister’s doll years before.

Co-ed number four was shot and taken to Kemper’s house, where she was beheaded. He had sexuality with the corpse and later axed it to parts, flinging the remains into the ocean near Carmel, CA.

He killed two more co-eds on February 5, 1973, again placing their own bodies in his trunk and chopping off their had. The next day, while mama was working, Ed washed blood off one of the girls’ bodies and had intercourse with the headless corpse.

Clarnell Kemper was right–her son was a real weirdo. Ed sometimes chilled his victims’ brains in the fridge and hid one girl’s chief facing his house so he could fantasize that she was watching him:” I talked to her, saying love things, the behavior you do to a girlfriend or spouse ,” he afterward would claim. He ate strips of another’s leg as part of a macaroni casserole. Ed likewise snapped Polaroids of his both victims and saved their skin and teeth as mementos.

In the midst of his spree, he often went to a local bar frequented by off-duty policemen, grilling them for details about the murders.

On Easter Sunday, 1973, “hes been gone” straight-out for the resources of his animus, whamming Clarnell in the psyche with a hammer while she slept and slitting her throat with The General. He decapitated her and threw her vocal cords, which had chided him since he was a son, into the garbage disposal.

The next day, he invited his mother’s pal over for dinner. He strangled the woman when she arrived and spent the nighttime in mom’s bed. Ed balanced Clarnell’s head on a box and used it as a dartboard for several days. Considering the barbarism he visited on his mother’s corpse, he said, “That seemed appropriate, as much as she’d bitched and hollered and yelled at me for so many years.”

Then he drove to Colorado and called police from a pay phone, admitting to the Co-Ed Killings. He politely “ve been waiting for” cops to arrest him and enthusiastically confessed. Kemper, who claimed to be” frightened of violence ,” prayed for the death penalty.

He would afterward claim that after killing his mother, he had gotten to the root of his problems and there was no more work to be done.

Trial And Imprisonment

Since Kemper eagerly confessed to his crimes in great detail, his defense lawyers were left with simply the lunacy defense as an option–after all, what sane person would use his mother’s beheaded brain as a dartboard?

However, the insanity defense failed and Kemper was sentenced to eight terms of seven years to life for the eight slaughters, to be operate concurrently.

In prison he has spent over 5,000 narrating books for blind people. FBI profiler John E. Douglas says Kemper is “among the brightest prison inmates” and displays “rare insight for a violent criminal.”

Although we continue to live in an overly simplistic world that views things through a binary lens where everything is black or white, good or evil, guilty or innocent, Kemper says he hopes its own experience demonstrates instructive and that people use his instance to learn how early childhood abuse can create monsters. For now, the best we can draw lessons from his gruesome string of murders is a perverse take on an old country and western anthem 😛 TAGEND

“Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be serial killers.”

The Killer In His Own Words

These and many other Ed Kemper quotes are at Quote Catalog.

My mother was there. She was there to beat me, she was there to humiliate me, she was there to use me as an example of how inferior men are.

At first I picked up daughters simply to talk to them, simply to try to become acquainted with people my own age and to continue efforts to strike up a friendship.

Oh, what is it like to have sex with a dead body ?… What does it feel like to sit on your living room sofa and look over and watch two decapitated girls’ brains on the arm of the lounge? The first time, it makes you sick to your stomach.

When they were being killed, there wasn’t anything going on in my thinker except that they were going to be mine….That was the only style they could be mine.

They were like heart wives….I still had their hearts. I still have them.

I remember it was very exciting…..there was actually a sex thrill….It was kind of an exalted triumphant type thing, like participate in the head of a deer or an elk or something would be to a hunter….I was the hunter and they were the victims.

I just wanted the rapture over the party. In other words, winning over demise. They were dead and I was alive. That was the win in my lawsuit.

Jim Goad

Stop worrying about good and bad…and start thinking about true and false.

More From Thought Catalog

Read more: https :// thoughtcatalog.com/ jim-goad/ 2018/06/ edmund-kemper

Country Music Legend Roy Clark Dead At 85

Country music entertainer Roy Clark, who traversed over to the mainstream via the long-running variety show “Hee Haw, ” died Thursday at his home in Tulsa, Oklahoma. He was 85.

According to a statement from his publicist, Clark died due to complications from pneumonia.

Born Roy Linwood Clark in Meherrin, Virginia, in 1933, “hes spent” part of his youth in Washington where “his fathers” played in a square dance band and inspired his son to take up the banjo and mandolin.

But it was the guitar that devoted Clark his job. He got his first one when he was 14 and was playing gigs within in a year.

Clark was soon touring with country legend Hank Williams and first played the Grand Ole Opry in 1950, according to his publicist.

Clark’s career actually took off in 1960 when he was invited to perform in Las Vegas. That was followed by his first country made, “The Tips Of My Fingers.”

His biggest reached overall was “Yesterday When I Was a little girl, ” a covering of a French anthem by Charles Aznavour that Clark turned into a top 20 popping reached in 1969.

Clark was a staple on both radio and TV throughout the 1960 s, performing on nearly every variety show of that period.

In 1969, he got one of his own: “Hee Haw, ” a rural-themed variety show he co-hosted with Buck Owens on CBS.

When the network canceled the prove two-and-a-half years later, the programme moved into syndication and aired until 1992.

In 1976, he becomes one of the first country suns to tour the Soviet Union, and in 1983 he was the first country sun to open a theater in Branson, Missouri, according to USA Today . Branson has since become a major vacation destination known for its musical venues.

News of Clark’s death spurred Twitter tributes.

Clark is lived by his wife of 61 years, Barbara; his sister, Susan Coryell; five children and four grandchildren.

A memorial gala will be held in Tulsa at a later date.

Read more: http :// www.huffingtonpost.com/ entry/ roy-clark-hee-haw-dead-at-8 5_us_5bedb2c2e4b09f4670081ce6

Britains Weird and Wonderful Houseboat Village in West Sussex

In West Sussex, England, a small community has formed around a colony of bizarre houseboats. Utilizing spare parts from old bus, weapons and aircrafts, each boat has its own unique look and feel.

Among the residents of the community is Hamish McKenzie. An imaginative houseboat renovator, hea

s incorporated his wacky and creative personality to create a truly spectacular home. From a microwave as a mailbox to the snout of a jumbo jet as a window, Hamish infuses glorious new life into discarded objects.

Read more: https :// twistedsifter.com/ videos/ houseboat-village-in-west-sussex-england-great-big-story /