We’ve all been caught in an uncomfortable situation that seemed weird on the outside but actually had a fairly reasonable explanation. Too bad, that often these experiences are so awkward for all the people involved that you don’t even have an opportunity to explain yourself. A Reddit user asked people to share their ‘biggest this isn’t what it looks like moments’ and the weave was flooded with the most embarrassing stories. Scroll below to read some and share your own in specific comments! ( Facebook cover image: iStock)
More of a “this isnt what it sounds like”…
A family we were close to had just moved to the US from India. They had a young daughter, like 5 years old, who was still learning English. One day she fell down the stairs while playing outside. She ran in hollering and saying “The stairs hit me! ” … once she calmed down her daddy corrected her and said “No no. You mean to say ‘I fell down the stairs’.”
A few days later my dad was demonstrating them the grocery store. In the checkout line the cashier understood the girl’s bruised up legs and asked what happened. The daughter responded with “What did you tell me to say, father? Oh right! I fell down the stairs.”
He had a fun time explaining that to the police.
It was my third day at my new office chore. When I washed my hands my gasps touched the counter top which was covered with sea. Naturally I now look like I pissed myself and had a giant 6 by 6 soaked area around my crotch. I couldnt walk around with that so I thought to use the hand dryer. Nonetheless, the hand dryer was the different types that you stick your hands in instead under. So I line up and basically mount this hand dryer like I am looking for a good time. I look at myself in the reflect and as I start believing “this wont appear good if…” and of course the CIO walks in before I could finish the thoughts and react. He looks at me and in deadpan voice says “Do I need to call HR? ” to which I responded “No, its consensual.” We had a good chuckle about it and he never let me forget that minute!
This is one of my mommas absolute favorite stories to tell:
My partner and I were in a kind of long distance relationship at this phase( high schoolers living 40 mins apart) and they are able to occasionally drive up after school to come see me
On this particular day my mommy came home from operate and was concerned with the lack of sound.
I hear her calling my name as she comes closer, she eventually gets to my closed bedroom door not wanting to see what I’m sure every parent is looking forward to by this point
She swings it open and observes my partner and I
…..putting together our brand new Millennium Falcon( full size for act figures) that we had just bought from Toys R us
My dog retained stepping on the pieces and messing things up in his dopiness so we shut the door
After that she never worried about us being alone.
Honestly think this might be the moment where my mom decided she wanted to adopt my partner.
Sometimes, I’m not sure who she loves more ……. s/
Btw – My partner and I got married this year and we still have that Millennium Falcon
I used to take my kids to different playgrounds as they were growing up. Often times I’d be out there with them, chasing them, being the random monster/ dragon/ foe while they run away and then eventually turn around and chase me back. Unavoidably since the rest of the parents were on their iPhones or doing anything but interacting with their kids, I’d end up with a collect who wanted to join in the fun.
It was all going well until they said they wanted to play “Minecraft”
So as a group of kids abruptly scatter from where I am standing screaming “Ah! Run away from the Creeper! Ahhh! ” I look up to see a line of parents abruptly jostled back into consciousness with absolutely no friggin context whatsoever.
My dad not me. Working construction in the dead of winter he gets back to the motel after drawing the night shift, he sits down on the couch and he is so frozen can’t bend down to take off his boots so his coworker who is a gigantic man gets down on his knees to undo my dad’s boots. The cleaning lady barges in to realize a massive humankind on his knees and head down in front of another man who’s sitting on the edge of a bed. Now my father did what anyone would do hurl his hands behind his head and moaned real loud.
Anytime I open a can that isn’t cat meat I have to explain to my feline that “this isn’t what it looks like.”
I work as a administrator at a grocery store. Some cashiers aren’t old sufficient to scan booze so I have to do it for them. I made a comment to a girl cashier after the 4th period she called me over. “I can’t wait until you’re 19. ” Took me a few seconds to realize what I said, in front of customers.
I used to work security/ reception at my corporation, so I greeted everyone when they came in the door and built sure they were wearing their safety badge. You could either wear your badge on a lanyard around your neck or on a retractable belt clip.
So I’ve been doing this job for like 2 years when I’m outside talking to some of the girls that work on the 2nd storey. One of them only flat out asks why I ever check out women when they come in to visit.
Turns out, there was a lot of talking here how I was “looking women up and down” when they came through the door. Well, I was seeming everyone up and down. I would look at their chest first and if there was no badge there, my eyes would move to their belt. It was kind of my job and stuff.
I will preface this by saying a couple of weeks prior to this, my spouse had bought some frilly underwear on clearance sale, and a couple of bananas to eat on the way to work. I was chilling in the car at the store while “shes gone” in when I smelled nasty over-ripe bananas. I reached into the backseat and pulled out the purse that had been forgotten back there. I take the underwear out of the purse and tie the old banana up dog poo style. No big deal, right?
For whatever reason, my brain goes I wonder if these brand new underwear now reek of old squishy banana? and I threw them to my nose and take a big whiff- right as a sweet old lady draws into the parking spot in front of our auto. She looks at me, panties pressed into my nose inhaling deeply, her eyes move wide-ranging with surprise, and visibly sway, she draws back out of the place and drives away. Literally leaves. Shopping trip-up cancelled. I know I had to look like some kind of degenerate pervert on a public minge-binge, but it wasn’t what it looked like.
TLDR: Seemed like a unclean panty smelling weirdo in the grocery store parking lot, nearly stimulate old lady stroke out in horror
I went to my friend’s house last night( edit: not actually last nighttime. I told this story before on Reddit and copy-pasted it without changing the time frame) and came back around 12:30 am. To set some context, my friend lives about an hour away from me on the opposite side of the city. When I was driving back home afterwards, this automobile cut me off on the on ramp, and I honked at them. I then turned back up the music, and pretty much drove home on autopilot, but when I got off the road at my exit, I realized that the same car that cut me off was in front of me. After that, I get kind of curious, because it had been about 30 minutes since the incident, and we’d changed roads twice already. I then got a little bit worried that they’d envision I was following them home, but I didn’t think too much of it–until the car started going up the same side streets I did.
Eventually, I realized that my 16 -year age-old neighbour who simply learned how to drive cut me off, and she and her friends were probably now petrified that some lunatic was following them home. I guess she’d called her mothers in the meantime because she drew into her driveway and the house lights were all lit up, and her father( a huge guy) was standing outside with a baseball bat. I then drew into my own garage and apologized for frightening them and it was all chill after that.
When I was little, my mommy would sometimes take me working in cooperation with her at a little store she operated. I would often pass the time( and stay out of moma
s mane) by depicting and handing out my a
works of arta
to clients. One period, when I was 3 or 4, I learned about dialing 911. I apparently reckoned the concept was so important, I wrote a
bellow 911 a
on all the doodles I handed out to the customers at moma
s shop that evening. Patently people starting supposing I had been kidnapped or something, and freaked out. My mama had fun explaining that one to the police!
My boyfriend and I had a fight and both went to bed grumpily( we therefore housemates and had separate bedrooms ). In the middle of the night I heard a LOUD thump in the living room area of the house. I grabbed my baseball bat and went through the entire house with the at-bat( and the daylights on ). Every closet, every closet, etc. Nothing was out of order and the doors were locked. I was still scared and running high on adrenaline.
It was about 4:30 in the morning and I had to get up at 6 so I only gave up on going back to sleep before that. I debated what to do for the hour and a half and decided to go to IHOP( open 24 h where I live ). As I was about to leave I realized that if I left my sleeping boyfriend in the house and the killers WAS actually still there and killed him I would feel highly guilty. So I went to wake him up just enough to warn him before I left for IHOP.
He woke up to me leaning over his couch, comprising a bat, and whispering about slaughter. He almost cried.
I was 16 and my parents only left the house for a dinner out. I had to do laundry so I start right after they left the door to get it done as early as possible.
As I’m filling the machine I notice a stain on my shirt and so I threw it with the rest of the clothes. I also look at my pants and decide to add them as well along with my socks and…f ** k it my underwear as well.
So I’m butt naked and I start the machine. I rush to the stairs to get to my room and dress up and that’s when the front door( which is right where the stairs are) opens and I freeze.
My dad comes in and sees me naked. We both aren’t moving a few seconds and then he laughs, grabs his wallet on the table and says: “So THAT’S what you are doing while we aren’t here? “. He then closes the door while giggling.
I’m there still in shock and ruby-red as a beet. I rush to dress and call my parents on my mother’s cell phone to tell them it’s not what they suppose as they are just laughing their ass off.
My best friend of 15 years, J, is a guy and with me being a girl we have always tolerated people assuming we HAVE to have sex. Spoiler: we dona
Anyways, we are camping with a few friends and got supremely drunk. One of my girlfriends, M, has taken off into the lumbers after a fight with her boyfriend and the 4 of us are trying to find her. At this level, Ia
m so full of tequila I know Ia
m are due to vomit so I ask my best friend to hold my whisker back.
We are in complete darkness, Ia
m on all fours puking, hea
s awkwardly standing in front of me kinda crouched down because hea
s a foot taller than me and comprising all my mane up while I heave. It looked … I know HOW it seemed but on “peoples lives” I was get sick. At this exact moment, M runs out of the woods, flashlight directly on us and shrieks a
HOLY S ** T SHES BLOWING HIM! a
m legit retching so hard I dona
t even heard her. By the time we got back to the campfire M had told everyone else what she saw. Shea
s still adamant to this day that she knows what she saw.
Edit: wow everyone got the incorrect suggestion of M wholly! Shea
s truly not a b ** ch, dramatic OH GOD yes but a b ** ch no. We had a metric f ** k ton of tequila that night no one was thinking rationallyd
As for J, hea
s not in the a
ya f ** kina
sad fathers. Ita
s possible to desire someone, enjoy their company and emotional support, without craving or required to be put your genitalia into their assorted body cavities.
Back when the Netflix app on Xbox had the theatre define where you could invite pals and watch movies. My pals and I were watching the history of sex film( being horny 12 year olds and thinking sex was funny) they paused the video on the statue of two guys f ** king, then my father strolled in. I looked at him embarrassed saying, “this isnt what it looks like” my father said, “it’s okay mike I’d love you anyways” and walked out.
Alright, as a student, when I visited my hometown I got to visit my grandmother before leaving back to university and granny always had small-scale chocolates for people visiting her. Her grandchildren would get more than one usually. As I was leaving the house she gave me one more to have it during the travel back home.
I ate a piece of chocolate while loading my stuff in the car and I throw the small chocolate in my back pocket, right before I say goodbye to my mothers. It was a hot day at the end of summer.
A bit before the exit to the freeway I was taking, I stopped at a traffic light and realized that the chocolate between my butt and my vehicle seat was not a good mind, so I’m reaching for it. Chocolate already melted and package already open attained my left hand full of melted chocolate.
Following the loud “well, s ** t”, I realize that the girl in the car next to me only appreciated a guy reaching his butt and bringing his hand up again full of a dark-brown unknown sticky thing.
The look on her face was entirely worth it. Simply bad thing is that melted chocolate won’t go away merely with tissues.
My friend and I were sitting at lunch bitching about this Chris guy who was in our class and who was an absolute twat. Really not a nice human being. At one point I turned around and insured another Chris, an absolute sweetheart, sitting nearby seeming utterly crushed. Took 5 minutes to convince him that we were not talking about him. I felt so bad though.
Not me but a kid I worked with. He comes in to the violate room comprising some sandwiches and a Dr Pepper, sits down and starts eating and then tries to have a liquor but he can’t open it. I offer to twist the eyelid off but no, he can do it he says.
So he puts this Dr Pepper in between his legs, grabs the eyelid with both hands and spins. This, patently, wasn’t a bright suggestion. It explodes over his lap attaining him look like he’s pissed himself.
So he goes to the bathroom to clean up, gets some loo rolling and starts mopping up but it still looks really bad.
Over by the radiator is a hand dryer, so in his infinite wise he throws one foot on top of the radiator and the slants his crotch to the hand dryer and starts rubbing furiously as the hand drier’s going.
Unluckily for him, he’s facing away from the door so when the next guy walkings in all he can see is this skinny dude rubbing his crotch like no tomorrow while waving it for the purposes of the hand drier.
Apparently the guy only walked right on back away after muttering a “sorry”.
He didn’t find it funny when I pointed out the Dr Pepper motto was “What’s the worst that can happen? “
One time during my teens, I was utilizing my grandparents’ computer to look up video game cheater codes. I was worried they might disapprove that I was employing cheats, so when my grandfather strolled into the room, I rapidly minimise the window and turned around to say hello and ask what he needed.
His response: “Oh nothing important, I’ll just come back later.” He virtually seemed to be rushing out.
I turned back to the computer screen in confusion, be noted that minimise the window had disclosed a pornographic pop-up ad hiding in the background. I was super embarrassed. He never mentioned it though.
I put my daddy in this situation when I was a kid. Probably around 10 years old or so.
For context, my papa rarely drank in front of us growing up but would occasionally have a beer. As parents often do, he would have me move get it for him if we were in the same chamber. I was a lazy kid and didn’t want to miss whatever we were watching on TV so I often observed this to be an exasperation but somewhat minor in the grand strategy of things.
So one day he’s chatting with a couple coworkers and I’m there. They were joking around about something and he turns to me and asks “You like me, right? ” I answer back “Yeah except for when you drink beer”.
Adult me face palms every time I think about that. My dad is awesome.
My boyfriend and I were hopping on the trampoline together years ago, merely ricochetting around like a couple of kids, giggling our butts off. It was fun! He accidentally butt dialed his parents, who speakerphoned our laugh, creaking springtimes, and gasping to a auto loading of people. They were all mortified. We were able to set it straight afterwards, but OOF. Sorry mom and dad.
The girl I was dating during sophomore year of college and I were both organ majors, preparing for an upcoming duet.
During the summer, it was so warm in the church where we practised( no air conditioning, and the organ installed up high in the rear where it was extra hot) that she and I played in our underwear, with just a small devotee to move the air.
We were shocked when we heard the locked door open, and realise the pastor enter the church. He glanced at us, playing the organ in next-to-nothing, but promptly left and locked the door behind him.
Later he told me at first he did a double-take, but then recognized we therefore doing the smart thing – and that in his seminary days, he would’ve done likewise.
I worked at a care home for the elderly. We had one patient who had Alzheimer’s and one of the few styles we had to soothe her when upset was to have her fold the napkins. I guess it stimulated her tranquilize to know she was being helpful, or maybe it reminded her of her past as a spouse/ mother.
So she was doing her folding one afternoon and a potential new inhabitant comes in with their own families. My resident with Alzheimer’s craves a change of tempo, but words it like “I’m genuinely getting tired…”
It looked for sure like were forcing elderly people with dementia to do all our operate … until they were exhausted.
Technically my mom’s.
My eldest cousin was a little shit. She was with my mom( her aunt) at the grocery store. She was around 5. My mom told her she could pick a treat, she said she craved a candy and an ice cream. Mom said no, she had to pick 1.
So my cousin says to the cashier ‘shes not my mother! ‘ and the cashier freaks out reckoning cousins been kidnapped or something. Mom had to explain that she’s her aunt. I think they ended up having to call my aunt, cousins momma, to explain the situation. This was back in like ‘8 5. My mom’s still annoyed.
Oh man. Sitting at a traffic light when I was eighteen. Craved to get something out of my pocket( chapstick I believe ). I was wearing jeans that, when sitting, might as well have locked pockets. I continue my eyes forward so I can see if the lighting turns green, while I dig into my pocket. Have to kind of thrust my hips upwards and move a bit to reach my hand amply into my jeans. During my gyrating pocket quest I induce eye contact with a girl traversing the crosswalk( Ia
m a guy ). A appear of horror crosses her face and she says something to her friend. The other girl gives me a disgusted seem as well and they hurry across the crosswalk. Ia
m sure it seemed bad from their perspective.
I was getting ready to take a shower( my bedroom has its own bathroom/ shower) and I was already naked in my bedroom simply waiting for the sea to get hot. Well, my dog was also in my bedroom because he ever hangs out there. I was feeing M& Ms merely lying on my couch naked during this time and plummeted an M& M onto the ground and it rolled under my couch. Being very anxious about what my dog feeds( especially chocolate ), I promptly got onto my knees on the ground and went to reach for the purposes of the bed for the M& M. It rolled kinda far, so I was doing that thing wherever you stretching your arm out as much as you are able to for the purposes of the bed and just barely touching whatever it is youa
re trying to get, without knocking it farther away. Well, my golden retriever discovered the position I was in and walked over and mounted me. Literally at that moment, my momma opens the door to my bedroom and sees me butt naked, bent on my knees, with my bird-dog mounted behind me. I intend, talk about the doggy style point ……. I had a lot of explaining to do. It felt like an American Pie situation.
When I was in secondary school we therefore roller skating and I couldn’t stop so I lifted my hands to not hit this girl in front of me. Of course I’m like “ahhhhhhhh” as I’m about to run into her and because of this she turns around right as I’m about to hit her and both my hands cup her boobs.
The teacher was like “Ron what the hell are you doing ?! “
Not mine but just heard this story last week from a friend. At a ball game with his sister/ friend in law and 4-5yo nephew. Brother in line for concessions, sister back at seats or whatever, little one needs to use restroom, they tell my chum no problem merely head in with the kid he knows the drill. The kid, like many do, starts to various kinds of strip down before going to the bathroom starts asking inquisitive questions about why there are so many people in bathroom, why are things the route they are in that restroom, but ultimately culminating with the now practically naked little kid asking him in a crowded public restroom, “but where is my family? “
Friend was growing weed in his closet, we were checking it out and his mama comes calling and then just walks right upstairs into his apartment. He runs out to intercept her, I run out 2 mins subsequently after closing up the rig, and she believes to this day we therefore having sex. Even told his then-fiance that she understands if we have a “group arrangement”…
Went to a friend’s house and since it was an after party for a play-act, in high school, on a Friday, of course there was beer and “weve all” underage. I wasn’t drinking but a buddy of mine needed to go home so I plummeted him off and headed back. As I get out of the car when I got back I noticed it was quiet but it’s a huuuge home( like 4-5k square feet) and I figured they were in the cellar doing something quieter and I couldn’t listen to them. Front door locked … OK I was just here 15 minutes ago, chief to back door, unlocked. Awesome. Now the whole house was beeping as if someone was breaking in. Holy fuck that’s this house right here. OH F ** K THAT’S ME.
Run into basement , nobody there. Upstairs , nobody there. Kitchen, lights off. Start to hear the house telephone reverberating but I don’t answer and I know it’s too late. Call friend , no response. Call another friend , no response. Read brew cans everywhere so I clean them up and conceal them, disguises the brownies they had, checked around the house one more day for material and waited for my inevitable demise. Friends call me back as I’m outside freaking the inferno out and they start to rush home.
Long story short the cops depicted up with two dogs and artilleries pointed at me and I get slammed to the ground and handcuff, friends arrived at home and explained situation just in time before I’m hauled off, they decided to run out to eat at the exact convenient time I left, never told me, and left the bank door unlocked with the house alarm armed. That was a hell of a night…
Was sitting and watching Tv, neighbours came over to visit with their kids. Their daughter operates over, inexplicably sits in my lap and jumps up and down several times before I can stand up.
The remote was in my lap. Kid says “What’s that hard thing? ” and stands up promptly. A little shaken, I also stand up, the remote falls off my lap and lands on the floor, and as I lean down to pick it up, I take a step forward and I kick it for the purposes of the coffee table. Turn to explain myself , notice I’m wearing pants that bunch up in the crotch Larry David style.
I drew an all-nighter once, came home after project, and sat down at the computer to check some emails. I was barely able to comprehend the words on the screen I was so tired. I reached into my gym shorts to scratch my balls, and I guess i just passed out within the next few seconds. I was detected passed out in the computer chair with my hand down the front of my shorts.
My brother and I got into a fist battle( he was right, I was wrong) and he punched me in the mouth. I was hemorrhaging pretty good and continued spitting blood on him for some reason. He went into the condo( vacation) and my mommy freaked out because he had blood all over him. It ran a little like this Mom – OMG YOUa
RE COVERED IN BLOOD Brother – calm down it isna
t my blood Mom – OMFG WHOSE BLOOD IS IT WHAT DID YOU DO ?!?! Brother – Mom Ita
s fine ita
s simply Tylera
s( me) blood Mom – OMFG DID YOU F ** KING KILL HIM ?!?! WHERE IS TYLER ?!?!? I strolled in shortly after alive and well. The dispute between my brother and I was resolved btw.
This is light-hearted.
I was like 13 channel surfing. I’m flowing through the crap channels. Exaclty as my papa walkings in the back door with my little brother, I flip past a browse network that is showing bras on live frameworks. I must have been on that channel for. 8 seconds. It was so ridiculously day, that it looked like I had the demonstrate on and changed it right after he came in. He gave me s ** t for it and wouldn’t believe me.
When my brother was young he was playing with the vacuum and covered himself with those suction circles. He had a physical subsequently that day and was like he was covered in hickeys
Also more of a “this isn’t what it sounds like”…
I was a weird person in high school, and my friends are similarly weird. We had no boundaries.
My friend and I were strolling to class, and were discussing the Jackass clip where they had a gas mask and tube assembly where one person wore the mask and the other farted into the tube. We supposed this sounded like a pretty cool notion and were considering trying this out..
As we walked around the corner, I said to him, “I’ll suck yours if you’d suck mine”. Que the hot girl conveniently rounding the corner at that precise moment…
My wife and I used to hide money in her underwear drawer so our kids won’t be delving through it because they think it’s gross. One morning, I was get garmented and wanted to get some money before I forget, so I was excavating through her underwear when my 5-year old son ensure me. He asked what I was doing and naturally, I can’t tell him that I needed fund so I had to say something like that I was cleaning things up. Pretty sure he didn’t believe me and envisioned I was looking for a pair to wear.
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